Social Anxiety

I went to a function last night.  I was REALLY nervous about going!  This is not a weight thing, its an anxiety thing.

I am a very reserved person in real life and extremely shy around those that I do not know.  I don't know why, as I am fine around those that I know, but with those I don't know, I am a mutant!  I don't know what to say, I don't talk much, I just will sit and listen.   Situations where I am going to a party where I know a few people, but not many, makes me sick, I will actually get an upset stomach and a massive headache as the time to go draws near.  I regularly back out of going to functions.  I will buy a ticket, then just not go.  I will have a "headache" or a "wardrobe malfunction", they are my usual excuses for backing out last minute as the anxiety of going it just too much.  The headache is not always a lie, often I am just so nervous about going that I do actually get a bad headache, but as soon as I send that text message and get out of it, the headache goes.  I'm just not a big party or big function sort of person.  Maybe that's just the way I am, I think I have always been this way.

I love small gatherings, like having lunch or coffee with friends (provide I know everyone or most of the people going).  I don't love them so much if there are say 10 people going and I know only one or two people, then my social anxiety takes over again.  I often have to really force myself to go to things. Most of my friends now know that I don't go to things.  They do invite me and more often than not I do buy a ticket to the event (they are usually fundraisers of some description) but then I don't go.   I will sometimes just use the "I have to work" excuse and not buy a ticket, but this can be a bit tricky!  A month ago, the week before 12WBT started I was out shopping one day, grabbing a few last minute things before it started.  I was at Big W and I received a text from a friend saying "where are you?"  It was a mother from school, not someone I talk to often, really someone I catch up with at school events, but I thought she may have seen my car at the shopping centre.  I sent her a text back saying where I was and I didn't hear back.  I spent most of the day shopping, then when I got home I logged into Facebook and saw photos of her and the rest of the group at their luncheon!!!!  It was the luncheon that I had said I couldn't go to because I was "working".  OMG, I was caught out on my made up excuse.  When I went to school pickup that afternoon, one of the mothers stopped by my car (in her car) and put down her window and said "so, you were out shopping, I thought you were working".  I had to then say that "work didn't need me (it was volunteer work at a local charity), so went shopping, I thought it was too late last minute to get a ticket to the function, so went shopping instead", LOL.   She then said "when we text you, I told everyone you don't go to things".  OMG the pressure!  Of attending a function!

Everyone is going to the 12WBT finale in Sydney, to the final workout and/or the finale party.  The thought of going to that party is terrifying.  I know that there is just no way I will be able to go.  I don't know anyone going, all of these people going seem to know lots of other people going.  Who will I talk to all night at the party.  It's the standing by myself looking like a friendless weirdo that worries me.
I have joined groups on Facebook, all of these people seem to be working out together, meeting up to exercise and I can not bring myself to go.   I would like to go and find some exercise buddies but for some reason I just don't feel that I can.  I may be ok turning up knowing that everyone going is in the same boat, but these groups seem to all know each other already, they have been exercising with each other for other rounds.

When I got to the function last night it was fine.  I chatted to those I knew, had a really great night and was so glad I went.  I almost didn't go.  It was a fundraiser event.  I had got 4 of my friends to buy tickets to the event, so I couldn't back out.  I couldn't get people to buy tickets then not go myself.  Then about an hour before the event started I received a text message from two of the friends who were cancelling.  They said now you don't have to go, LOL (they know me so well, they are the ones I got caught out using the work excuse with).  I told them that it was fine!  I was the queen of the last minute cancel, LOL,  so it wasn't a problem and that unfortunately I had two other friends going so I HAD to go.  Anyway it was an awesome night, all of the people that I work with at my local charity were there and it was lovely seeing them, I had fun with my friends.

I don't seem to have the same problem though in situations like this.  Blogging, or on forums where it's anonymous,  I can be myself, well the non reserved self and chat with strangers, I just can't do it face to face.  I wonder why that is?  I don't think I could be the same on my blog or on forums, if any of my friends or family knew about my blog or followed the same forums.

Oh well, that's just the way I am I suppose.  A friend gave me a book on "Highly Sensitive People" and that's me!  I did a test online to see if I was a highly sensitive person and I am definitely one of those people.

So here I am, chatty and free to express myself here, not worried about what anyone else thinks.  But if any of you ever meet me in person and I am quiet and don't speak much, it's not you,  it's just because I am painfully shy and reserved and nervous.   I will loosen up as I get to know you.

Mortifying Moments

I know we all have moments where we just want to shrivel up into a tiny little ball and become invisible.

I had one of those moments just before I started on this program (12WBT).  I hurt my knee, badly, it blew up like a balloon, I could hardly bend it.  It would give way from under me.   I had it for about two weeks and it wasn't getting any better.  Well it would, the swelling would go down, when I was sitting with my leg propped up on a cushion, but as soon as I would start walking around up it would go again.  I limped horribly as it hurt so much to bend the leg and I had to be careful that it didn't give way when I walked on it.

People would ask "What did you do".  What I wanted to say was that I was heli-skiing in Switzerland and when I landed I hurt my knee.  I wanted to give them some exotic or great reason that I hurt my knee.  When the reality was I bent down to put food in the dogs bowl and heard a massive pop.    The reality is that my knee has trouble holding up my weight and it's not operating as it should!  That's the reality.  But I much preferred the skiing story, LOL.

So I went to the Dr, he ordered an MRI and I was found to have a ruptured bakers cyst, a torn meniscus (something like that) and the beginnings of arthritis!   So I was sent to a specialist.  Now the specialist I was sent to was a parent at my son's school, I knew his wife, our son's are friends or were friends (you know how kids change their friends when they are young).   So he inspects my knee, tells me that it may require surgery but then proceeded to get out some charts and put crosses here and there, he was circling areas.  Then just went into it.  SO, you are obese, you are here (pointing to one of the crosses he had drawn on the chart), you need to be here (pointing to another cross he had marked on the chart).  He then pointed out the obese definition (thanks for that, like I didn't know the definition already).  He then, without looking up, proceeded to tell me that I needed to exercise, I needed to reduce my calories, improve my nutrition and get the weigh off as being obese is a big problem.  If I lose the weight then the arthritis will stop developing further.  He just went on and on and not in an overly friendly way.  It was all very clinical, direct, not much emotion.

I was absolutely mortified!   I think it was worse because I know the Dr, I have to see him at school and I felt I was being looked down on, I felt like a sub-par human being.   I was so embarrassed and just wanted to turn invisible on the spot.  I've had Dr's tell me I needed to lose weight, both my cardiologist and neurologist (my torn artery doctors), have told me to lose weight and that was when I was 18 kgs lighter than I am now, but they didn't seem to deliver the words in the same way, or maybe it was because I didn't know them.

So here I am now, busting to lose the weight.  I can't wait until I can turn up at school and be a toothpick and say, "there I did it".  I know that he won't care.

I'm just looking forward to not being looked down on any more by those who are not overweight.  It happens all the time.  My brother is the worst!  He looks down on me and is SO condescending due to my weight.  He is SO fit, SO healthy, has studied nutrition.   So it will be nice, to be a fit version of me, so I stop getting the condescending comments and disapproving looks all due to my weight and not have that feeling that I am being judged because I am not thin.

A Yummy Lunch

I have a few lunch options that I absolutely LOVE from 12WBT.

The other day, taking ingredients we have been having on the program, I created my own recipe.  One of the items that I have been introduced to on the 12WBT program is Mountain Bread.

Chia Mountain Bread

This is so delicious, so nice and light.  As my son eats more calories than I do, when i make these I give him two slices of mountain bread, whilst I only have one.

So this is one of my favourite lunches at the moment, it is 261 calories (so you could increase this slightly by adding more salad items or a little more turkey).


I start with a slice of chia mountain bread

I spread 1/4 of an avocado out over the whole slice of bread.

I then measure out 120 grams of oven roasted turkey breast.

Weigh the turkey to ensure you have the right amount.

I cut off all fat (sometimes there is a little around the top) and lay this out over the avocado, covering the mountain bread.

I then sprinkle a large handful of radish sprouts over the whole mountain bread (about half a cup).

Radish Sprouts (or microgreens)

I then wash some english spinach (about 1/4 to half a cup, it's only 2 to 4 calories for 1/4 to half a cup of spinach so add as much as you like)

I then carefully roll the mountain bread.

Creating a perfect long yummy turkey, spinach, radish and avocado sausage.

Voila, this is how it looks.  Yummy, filling and healthy!

I like spreading the ingredients out over the whole mountain bread, rather than just putting them in the middle and rolling as you get a mixture of bread and ingredients the whole way through.  At just 261 calories, this is a delicious and filling lunch!

My Breakfast

Sometimes I don't have time for the 12wbt breakfast or I'm not a fan of that days offering so I have my own creation for those days.

I throw together my own breakfast and it comes to 243 calories and it tastes delicious.  Here is what I have.

A cup of Heritage Flakes.   Heritage Flakes are made from ancient grains, including spelt, kamut, quinoa, oat, barley, millet and is sweetened with organic honey.

Natures Path Heritage Flakes

Some sultanas

Sultanas

Some blueberries

Fresh Blueberries

Some strawberries

Strawberries

Some chia seeds

Chia Seeds

and some skim milk.

Skim Milk

Put together, it looks like this...

My Yummy Breakfast

Yummy Dinners

This week has had some of the yummiest dinners on the program yet.

Now don't get me wrong... There have been SO many good meals!  Printing up the recipes on 12wbt each week means that I am really creating quite a recipe book.

Two of the dinners this week have been added to the family favourites.  There was "I cant' believe it's not butter chicken" and Beef Stroganoff.

The chicken dish was a complete hit!  Our family are not big curry or spice eaters.  We rarely have indian food or hot chilli meals.  But the chicken dish used tandoori paste and it was just so delicious I had my son asking for more.  We even got to have papadums with the chicken meal.  I have only had those once before and really couldn't remember what they tasted like, but we loved those too.  My son also had rice with his and gobbled it down.

I can't believe it's not butter chicken with papadums

Then the beef stroganoff.  The serving I felt was huge!  My son again had it with rice.

Beef Stroganoff with pasta and green beans.

What I am loving is how quick and easy the meals on 12wbt are.  I am often too tired to make dinner so we have take away or something quick and easy.  But most of these meals have a very short prep time and a short cooking time so it makes cooking dinner after a long day really easy!

Tip:  Always serve your food in smaller bowls, or small plates.  Using large plates or bowls makes the meal look small.  In small, cereal type bowls it makes a meal look huge!

My New Toy - An iPhone 5

Yesterday was the release of the iPhone 5.   I was one of those people who lined up before the store opened to get my hands on one.  I actually needed three, my son wanted a black one and I was getting a white one and my mum wanted a black one.

So at 6.00am we headed down to our local shopping mall which happened to have an Apple Store.  We had breakfast before heading down there.  I knew from past lining up for Apple products that the do go along the line with food and drinks, so I didn't want to be tempted with any naughty snack items, so having breakfast first, it meant that I wouldn't be hungry and hopefully not tempted with anything they had on offer for the line waiters. 

We were by no means the first there when we arrived at 6am, there were probably 150 people in front of us.  

The line at 6am.  Apple Store a long way in the distance.

The store was opening at 8am, so we only had a two hour wait.  We were equipped with our camping chairs to sit on and I took some tea.  It really went very quickly.  Staff were constantly walking along the line with trolleys of water and snacks, they seemed to be doing the rounds about every 15 minutes or so. 

Starting another round of water and snacks.

They also had a local cafe who was going up and down the line taking orders for tea, coffee and hot chocolate.  I had taken a large green tea myself so didn't have any from that trolley.   All I did indulge in from the treat trolleys was bottles of water.  On the food trolley there were chips, chocolates, lollies (candy) and apples.   It was all free!  Apple sure do look after their customers who wait for a long time to get their hands on their latest gadget.

At about 7am.  The line started to move.  We moved along to a check point, where we were asked which phone we wanted (16, 32 or 64GB, black or white) and we were then asked if we wanted a new sim card and if we did, which telecommunications company we were with.  We were then asked if we were buying the phone outright or on a plan.   Once we made our order, we were given a little ticket with what we were wanting.  Once we had chosen we were not allowed to change our choice, well we could, but it meant moving to the end of the line!   

Once we were given our tickets, we were moved into two lines.  The outright line or the contract line.  As I was getting mine on a contract, we were went to the contract line!  I couldn't believe it, we had hardly anybody in front of us!  So we were right outside the front of the store.  Then it was opening time and all the apple staff ran around the whole line, yelling and screaming before arriving back at the store and the first people were let in.

In they go.

It took about half an hour for us to get in and get our phones.  Then an hour in the store, buying and setting up three phones.  

I am loving my new phone.  It is so much lighter than the 4.  The speakers are much better and clearer for some reason.  It feels nice in the hand, is no wider than the old one but is taller (longer).  The screen is SO clear.  With every phone it seems to get clearer and clearer and you wouldn't think that it can get any better, but somehow it does.  Whist the new charger is not bad, I like how small it is.  It's a bit annoying now needing two chargers, one for ipad and one for the phones.  It really was easier having one charger that fit everything.  Now if we travel we will need to take another charger (on top of the different camera chargers, the video camera chargers, the DS chargers, now the ipad chargers, the phone chargers, the laptop charger.  Chargers take up half a suitcase, LOL.

So here it is.  My new white 32GB iPhone 5.

iPhone 5

I really do enjoy lining up for new apple devices.  I don't know that I would on any day other than release day.  There is just something about the atmosphere of waiting for a new device.  You chat to other people in line, the staff walking around with food and drinks and chatting to those waiting.  It's just a fun atmosphere.  So now off to play with my new toy!

Yes! Results

Yesterday was weigh in and also being the 4 week mark we had to do our measurements too.

I have been kind of sneaking in extra weigh ins.  I have weighed myself during the week rather than just doing it every Wednesday morning.  I am just too curious and impatient to wait a whole week to see if I have lost weight.   My measurements on the other hand.  I have not done.  To be honest I really didn't think I had lost anything in the measurement department.  Maybe a cm or two but really not much.

Well can you imagine my shock when I did my measurements yesterday morning to find that I had lost 21.5 cm.  Yes that's right, 21.5 cm.  I was just thrilled.  I lost 6 cm off my chest, 4 cm off my waist, 3.5 cm off my hips, 1.5 cm off one arm and 2 cm off another, 1 cm off one thigh and 3.5 cm off the other thigh!  I don't quite get why I lost so much off one thigh and not the other.

Now for the weight results.  I only lost 700 grams this week.  So that's a total of 4.7kg in 4 weeks.  It also put's me into the 70's!  Love moving out of the 80's.

I have been really down the this last week.  Feeling in a bit of a rut, a slump, just not my normal positive self.  Far too much negativity and a lack of motivation.  Well I can say that after seeing that I had lost 21.5cm so far and 4.7kg so far I was given a much needed boost.  Add to that the win in the weekly surprise last week I am really feeling much better and back to my positive, driven self.

Bring on week 5 (and 6, 7, 8... 12, LOL).

I hope everybody else has had great results, results you are happy about and proud of.    After all, we should all be very proud of ourselves, regardless of our results, just knowing that we have done our best!

Weekly Surprise - WINNER

YES!  That's right.  I can't believe it!  Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation challenge has a weekly surprise each week.  Everybody doing the 12wbt can enter.  I have entered each week so far, but I have yet to win one.   Week 2 was an Inspiration Board.  Wow were there some amazing entries.  There was one who stuck her pictures to a pair of jeans, it was absolutely AMAZING and as soon as I saw it (and I'm sure everybody else), it was a winner, just so clever and incredibly inspirational.

This last week's challenge was a blog challenge.  We had to nominate our blog (or somebody else's) for one of the weekly prizes.  This week the prize was a set of Chiballs.  I had never heard of these balls but I have googled them and they look fantastic.

Well this morning the email came through and I am one of this weeks winners!  I can't believe it!  I can not tell you how excited I was!  I can't even win an argument let alone a competition, so I was just SO excited this morning when I saw my name there on the winner list!  I was jumping around the room, singing "I won, I won".  My son looked at me like I was a lunatic, LOL. I had such a down week this last week, was feeling very low and I don't know, not positive.  But I can not tell you what this win has done!  It has given me a big boost, new added vigour that I need to carry on and give this challenge my all.

So I would like to say a MASSIVE thank you to every one of my readers who nominated my blog.  I know when I saw the first nomination made by a 12wbt member on the forums I was blown away.  I write my blog, not knowing if anybody is actually reading, so to see somebody nominate my little blog was just beyond exciting and I was just so grateful for every one of you who did.  So THANK YOU!

I also want to say thank you to all of my readers out there.  I don't know how many of you there are, but I know there are some.  I really appreciate that you are sharing this journey with me and offering support and inspiration with your comments.

Thank you so much Michelle Bridges and the 12wbt crew for choosing my blog and for that fantastic Chiball set! Such an awesome prize!

I would like to give a shout out and a big congratulations to all of my fellow winners of this week's surprise.  Pop over and see their blogs!  They are all amazing and so inspirational.  Thanks to Casey from http://kcmason12wbtjourney.blogspot.com.au for doing up the list too (I did get the list from your post on the forums).

http://sailorvee.com

http://bodyimagediaries.blogspot.com.au

http://mishsmash.wordpress.com

https://www.facebook.com/Traceys12wbtJourney

http://daynamorphic.blogspot.com.au

http://kcmason12wbtjourney.blogspot.com.au

http://eatingmovingwriting.blogspot.com.au

http://theblogofjules.blogspot.com.au

http://leitchy.blogspot.com.au

http://www.shehascuterunners.com

http://cocogirlbutter.blogspot.com.au

http://caitlinramrakha.com

http://theskinnyonamydeville.wordpress.com

http://idontwantfrieswiththat.wordpress.com

http://wonderwomankipwil.blogspot.com.au

http://www.rach-v2.blogspot.com.au

http://www.finding-carol.blogspot.com.au

http://newstartsugarfree.blogspot.com.au

http://fitandhappynotfatandhippy.com

Birthday Dinner

It's my mother's birthday today and she is came to our place for dinner.

I decided to make the Beef Lasagne from the Week 2 12WBT menu.  It is so quick and easy to make and most of all delicious.  I know it's a meal that everyone will love and it's something I can eat with confidence that I will be within my correct calorie intake.

Beef Lasagne with Spinach and Ricotta.  YUMMO

I served garlic bread and salad as well and it was a huge hit! (No I didn't have any of the garlic bread, although it smelt SO good).

Not Feeling Great

I'm not feeling great this week about my progress.  Weigh in day is tomorrow and for the first time this challenge I'm dreading it!

I know I have lost some weight (yes I've cheated and already jumped on the scales).  But I have had such a great loss (4kgs in the first 3 weeks) that I am quite disappointed with the 500 grams I have lost so far this week.  I can't see losing too much by tomorrow.

Then I have the fitness test tomorrow too, the 1km run and all the rest of it.  I know I have not been exercising any where near as much as I should.  Once my stitches come out tomorrow I will step the exercise up.  I have been sticking to the 1200 calories a day.  I have stuck largely to the menu plan, but with things like satay on the menu this week, as someone with an anaphylactic reaction to peanuts and other nuts, I'm going to steer clear of those dishes this week and have other meals from the 12wbt recipe index instead.

I am determined to lose this weight and I am determined to reach my goal of 12kgs for this 12 week challenge.  I just have to get myself out of this negative head space that has crept in this week.  I do snap out of it, but then it creeps back the next day.

Onwards and upwards (or downwards is the way I want the weight to go).

New Shoes

I have been having such bad shin splints I decided to get some new shoes.   So off I went to Athlete's Foot and had some shoes fitted.

Introducing you to.... Brooks Adrenaline GTS 12.  They are super comfortable and I just gave them a test run.  Walking of course thanks to the stitches in my back.  Gosh, I'll be happy to get those out out on Wednesday.  They are itching and driving me crazy and they are right in the middle of my back so I can't reach them to scratch!   Anyway back to the shoes!

My New Shoes

I would have liked them in pink!  Or some bright cute colour.  But at the shop they said I needed the right fit, not to go by pretty colours.

Anyway I am very happy with them and I guess if I had bought pink I wouldn't have been able to wear a red outfit would I?  Couldn't have my shoes clashing with my workout gear.  At least with these colours they will go with everything, LOL.

Saturday Morning

I have just been and had breakfast with friends at a local restaurant.  It is kind of a Saturday tradition, we have been doing it for years.  It started with just myself.  I would take my son to golf, then go to the restaurant and have breakfast and read the paper whilst he was playing and then he would come and join me after he had finished.  Then one week my friends came and they have been coming along ever since.

My friends son has been battling cancer for a few years now and is going through chemo again at the moment, so I really enjoy catching up with them each Saturday.  They are amazing people, have been through SO much the last few years and they are such happy, kind, thoughtful, positive people.  With everything they have had to deal with over the last few years, the multiple long chemo treatments, the many many surgeries and they are still happy, thoughtful, positive people!  Yes sure they have their bad days but they are inspirational.  I am whinging because my back is sore, with a few stitches, then I see them and see my friends son and all of the surgeries he has had, the agony he has been in for years,  mine is nothing.  Makes me grateful for all I have, my health, my family, my friends.  It also makes me want to look after this body I have.  I have this mostly healthy body and I abuse it, by being overweight.

Unless it's raining, I always walk to breakfast.  It's about a 30 minute walk there and then the same home, so it's a good walk.    I had a YUMMY egg white with one egg yolk omelette.  Inside I had spinach, mushrooms, shallots and a little feta.  It was so delicious.  I was good though, I didn't eat the two slices of sour dough or the butter.

Spinach, Feta, Shallot & Mushroom Egg White Omelette

I have been having the same thing for the last couple of years (only before 12wbt I had the bread too).  You would think that I would get sick of it.  But no, I don't.  Each week, it's back for the same thing.  I love that I can get the omelette the way I like.  My omelette is not on the menu.  I just have to ask for a "Monnie Omelette" and the chef know's what it is.  Sometimes I don't even have to order, the waitress will be walking past our table and say "the usual" as she walks, we all just nod, LOL.  I have the inside ingredients raw, so they are not cooked in any oil or anything before being put into the omelette.  The heat from the egg cooks them.  I also have no salt.  I have had "no added salt" in all meals for years now, with having high blood pressure, I have always tried to live a low sodium diet as much as possible.

I have an early morning tomorrow with my son starting rowing.  I used to do rowing and that is something that I would love to do again.  It's a great workout.  It's on the must do list.  I hope everyone has a great weekend.

My Mind Games

I don't know how anyone else feels but sometimes, I do have negitive thoughts creeping in to this overactive mind of mine from time to time.  I do try to move past those thoughts as quickly as I can as I am generally a positive person.  I will hop on Pinterest and look at and repost positive and inspirational quotes and photos.  For those that follow me on Pinterest, I have just released my little secret...  when you see me on a reposting frenzy you will know I'm having a moment of mind games going on in my head.  I will look for others who have done it, to remind me this is possible, pop onto the 12wbt forums.

I do definitely believe this whole thing, weight issues, is a mind issue.  It's all a mind game.   I do wonder how I got here.  For 3/4's of my life I did not have a weight problem.  I exercised, played tennis, swam, skied, gym sometimes, would walk for miles.  I ate what I wanted I guess, I don't ever remember being hungry.  I'm trying to think back, how I was just 12 years ago, how I thought back then, what and why I changed, from habits I had for 30 years and how these new habits formed.   How did I get in this place and find it so hard to get out of it?  What happened in my mind that snapped into a different mindset? Such a self destructive mindset.   I really don't understand how for 30 years I had never been overweight and now I am, 12 years later!  I look at the fact I still have 20kgs to lose to get to my goal weight.  It seems so far away.  But then I have to snap out of that and not look that far ahead, just look at my goal for this challenge... 12kg, of which I have lost 4kg already.

I was looking at the most amazing, inspirational life changes the other day.  Have a look at Dee and Jayne (links are below).  Their journey, their transformations are just incredible.  The work these girls have done.  Have a look, you will be inspired.  You can not, not be inspired by these ladies.
Dee's Journey   https://www.facebook.com/pages/Dee12wbt/310565212311182
Jaynes Journey https://www.facebook.com/pages/Jaynes-12wbt/145857622173214

I look at their transformations and think how they must feel now, how proud they would be of themselves.  How proud they would be of all the work they have done to transformation their bodies, their minds and their lifestyle.   How proud their families would be of them for their amazing transformation after watching all of their hard work.  I want to feel like that.  It also makes me think... Did they feel like I do now?  They were at the beginning of their journey not so long ago, they were looking at others inspirational journeys knowing that one day that would be them.  Did Dee or Jayne ever have those moments where they thought they may not make it?  I look at Dee's before shot and that could be me now.  I really hope that I can be proud of myself one day very soon, like they would be now.  I hope that I will be able to one day inspire others like they do.  I hope that one day I can have people look at my journey and my success and make them keep going, just like those ladies do.

Dee and Jaynes journeys' were for themselves, to have a longer, happier and healthier life.  I wonder if Dee and Jayne realise just how much they do for others, by embarking on their journey.  When they started out like I am and many others are right now, did they know that their journey would be helping others change their lives.  Because they are.  I look at Dee's photo, the one with her before photo and the others along the way and I so want that for me.  I am so proud of those ladies for what they have done and I don't even know them.

I want to thank Dee and Jayne.  I want them to know that by changing their life they are helping others change theirs.  Thank you Dee and Jayne for helping me.   When I am having a weak moment I do look at your journey's and you do make me think, I can do this!  Thanks Ladies!

Favourite 12WBT Tip

I can't believe that we are at week three already!

One of the tips I have learnt from 12wbt (and I have picked up many, thanks to the awesome snip tips) that I am using all the time, will not be a tip you will be expecting.  I absolutely LOVE this tip.  I have been using it every single night whilst making dinner.  It is to have a rubbish bowl on the kitchen bench.  Simple I know, but it's something I have never done before.  Whenever I cook I just put rubbish on the bench, or carry some over to the sink or to the bin.  Sometimes I will have a plastic bag on the bench and put rubbish in as I chop, but I have never had a bowl, specifically for rubbish sitting there with me and now I do and I love it.  No wandering to the sink with onion skin, garlic peel, then carrot ends, then shallot ends etc.  Now I just pile them all into the bowl and empty all at once.

Gosh I am loving the food on this program.  What's also great is so is my son!  Well my son is only having the dinners.  I won't make him different food.  Well I have never made him different food, from when he first started eating he has eaten the same meals as us/me but sometimes in modified form.  I am having to modify them now but to increase calories, adding rice to his meal with the stir fry, larger portion of lasagna etc.   I thought my favourite meal was the Lasagna we had the other night.  But last night was steak with a creamy mushroom sauce!  My son actually asked me if he could lick the plate, LOL.  I did change the steak a little.   We had eye fillet steak, rather than the rump and I also added some fresh garlic to the sauce.  But it was the most delicious meal.  That will be another regular in our household!

So I have the food under control, I just have to get the exercise under control!

Baggy Pants

Ok, that is a lie!  I don't have baggy pants.... YET!

Week three weigh in today.  Now for those not doing 12WBT, we started on Monday 27th and our first weigh in was Wednesday 29th.  So week one weigh in was only two days after starting.  But that was to get us to an every Wednesday weigh in.  So in two weeks and two days I have lost..... 

Drum roll please....

 4kg exactly (8.81 lbs).  I lost 1.2kgs this week which I am very happy about considering the only exercise I have been able to do is walking (see a post last week about skin cancer) and I couldn't do that for a couple of days thanks to pain.  But sticking to the 1200 calories a day is what has helped I think.

So back to the baggy pants.  Well that was a fabrication I will say, but I can definitely notice a difference in my jeans.  They were really starting to get a little tight, with an attractive muffin top.  That was one of the things that made me seek out this program.  It was either that or get a new pair of jeans.  Option 1... Spend $200 on a pair of new, larger jeans.   Option 2... Spend $200 on changing my life and doing Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation  (and ultimately having to buy an new pair of jeans, but I am happy to purchase a smaller pair, LOL).  I chose Option 2!

Anyway, there is no sign of the muffin top now which I am thrilled about and the jeans are getting a little looser.  It means I can wear tighter tops again.  As my jeans developed the muffin top.  Ok my jeans did not develop it, my stomach did.  I could no longer wear tighter tops, I had to wear baggy tops to cover the embarrassing over hang.  Now I'm back into my normal tops.  

I have a fundraiser cocktail party to go to in two and a half weeks.  If I've lost 4kgs now, another 4 or even 3 in that time will mean I'm 7kgs lighter (15.4 lbs) and surely some people will notice.  I'm quite excited about it actually, it's nice when people start to notice a change in your body shape.

Next goal, go down a jeans size!  That won't be far away!

How is everybody else going on their journey?

Weekly Shop

I have not been one to do a weekly shop in the past.  I would find that when I would do weekly a shop, I would end up wasting a lot of food a I would buy things, that I know we would like, but with no real meal or menu planned.  So I stopped doing it, I started going to the supermarket in the afternoons, on the way to or home from school pick up.  The only problem is, that if I couldn't be bothered,  we would just grab take away.  Sushi, Japanese, Pizza (always from a local Italian restaurant so it's good pizza with really fresh ingredients, but yes, it's still pizza).

I shop at a local organic supermarket so I would tend to go shopping every two or three days as they get their fresh produce in on Monday's and Thursdays. 

My local organic grocery store.  Love the fresh produce.

But I have not been doing the three + weekly shop that I was doing! I now go to the "big supermarket" as we call it in our house (Coles, Woolies) on a Sunday to stock up on everything I need from the 12wbt weekly menu shopping list that I can't get at my local organic supermarket. Then on a Monday, I go to the "little supermarket" organic grocer. To stock up on everything else.

My trolley of shopping for the week.

I can not tell you how much better it is doing a menu plan for the week! This has really saved me a lot of money, due to not buying random things that I think may be nice to cook, should I find a recipe and never end up doing. It has also made me a lot more organised so that I do actually cook at home, rather than racing out for some sushi.

So tip for everyone who is not following 12wbt, do up a weekly meal plan! Then shop for it! Makes things so much easier.

Temptations

I seem to have been bombarded with temptations since starting 12wbt and I am thrilled to say that I have not given in once.

A few days after this challenge started on 27th August, it was my son's birthday.  Every year he takes cupcakes to school as they are not allowed to take a cake.  Too hard for the teachers to cut up arrarently.  So he put in an order for Mars Bar cupcakes, his favourite (and they are my favourite too).  He also wanted them for his party.  So a few days after starting this challenge I made a batch of 27 cupcakes and I didn't have one!   I didn't even lick my finger, or have a little chunk of mars bar as I normally do (you know the drill, one piece of mars bar for the mouth, one for the top of the cupcake and that routine continues as you chop mars bars, LOL).   Two days later I had to make another batch for the party and again, didn't have one.  Even as the other parents at the party were indulging away, I again resisted.


My Mars Bar Cupcake

What did some people give my son for a present? A Jumbo box of Cadbury Favourites! OMG!!! Oh I love Favourites!  He also got a massive block of Toblerone.  Luckily I am allergic to nuts, so the thought of Toblerone makes me ill, literally, lol.  But the Favourites are a different story!  I love those.  They are sitting at the top of the pantry, have been there for 9 days, slowly going down, but not one has been eaten by me!

The night of my son's birthday we went to my mothers for the birthday dinner.  There was home made chocolate pudding, with home made vanilla and chocolate ice cream.  I have to tell you that this is my all time favourite dessert.  It's a dessert we had as kids and is now being made for the next generation.  I again resisted the temptation!

Along came Fathers Day.  Lunch was at my house.  The lunch was easy, all very healthy but there was one request.... My famous double chocolate brownies with organic coconut ice cream.  I couldn't deny my dad his dessert request on Fathers Day, so I made it.  Again, I did not become tempted.

I can't believe it! I have not given in once!  I have to say, excuse me for tooting my own horn, but really I am very impressed with my willpower!

I have another coming up next week.  An afternoon tea for the kids at school and every class has been given something to make.  I was looking down the list.. Sushi, sandwiches, fruit platter... And I get to my sons class, and I see "cupcakes".  MORE CUPCAKES!  I said "oh for goodness sake universe, what is up with all of this torture temptation?".  I will again make cupcakes and I WILL again resist temptation!

Skin Cancer

Well what a couple of weeks of ups and downs this has been.

I will firstly say that I absolutely LOVE Michelle Bridges 12 week transformation challenge.  I love the food/nutrition plan, love the forums, love the whole way the program is structured.  The one thing that I have struggled with over the last week specifically is exercise.

I had a large skin cancer cut out of my back last week and have a back full of stitches, well not full, I have a long line of them.  It was a basel cell carcinoma.  It's at the top half, near my bra line, so every time I move it pulls and hurts.  Who knows how long it's been there.  It was quite large and being on my back, under my hairline, it was probably growing there for years.

So I am restricted with exercise as it can be easily pulled open.  The Dr has put a special tape over a large portion of my back, he didn't say why, but I assume it's so that I don't pull on the stitches too much.  So I am restricted with exercise for the two weeks that the stitches are in and then the Dr said I have to be even more careful for 7 to 10 days after they come out so as not to split the wound open.

Skin Cancer removed from the centre of my back.

I have had three cut out of my back before.  All three split open and I have huge scars where this has happened so I am going to be careful so that I do not add more to the already ugly road map that has become my back.

So this week I didn't do anything for the first couple of days, then I have been walking.  It does even hurt to walk, as just moving my arms does pull and push on my upper back but I just plod along.  Well with this walking my shin splints have flared up!  I am sitting here now with ice on my right shin in particular.  The left doesn't seem to be as bad.  Shin splints are agony and they just don't seem to go away!  The more you walk or run on them, the worse they seem to get!  I've been upping my magnesium tablets, trying to stretch them, ice them and my next step.... New Shoes!  I am going to head to Athletes Foot this week and be fitted with some new shoes, this may be the problem.    As being limited to what I can do for the next two and a half weeks I need my legs to work, so I am helping that new shoes will help with the sore shins.

So how have I gone with weight loss?  Well even though I have been restricted in the exercise department I have been sticking to the eating plan, well pretty much.  There have been a few meals that I wasn't a fan of, so swapped those for other meals from the 12wbt recipe index that were similar in calories.  So we started Monday 27th August and we had our first weigh in on Wednesday 29th August.  I know, not long after the start but every Wednesday is weigh in so the first weigh in was not long after starting.  In the first weigh in I lost 1.6kgs (3.52 lbs), then last Wednesday I lost another 1.2kgs (2.64 lbs), so that is a total of 2.8kgs in the first 10 days.  I am absolutely thrilled with that.  My goal was 1kg a week for this challenge, with a total of 12 kgs.  So to have lost 2.8kgs, that is more than I was hoping for, so I am one happy little diva!

Week 3 starts tomorrow and I can't wait!

Menu Plan On 12WBT

I love Thursdays!

Thursdays are when the menus for the next week are released.  I sit down, print up the weeks menu planner.  Add it to my binder and cross out the meals I don't like the sound of and find something else to replace it with.  I then print up all of the recipes and add them to my binder.  I love this recipe book that we are creating on this challenge, they are recipes that are already becoming family favourites.

Once I have printed the menus, it's time to print off the week's shopping list.  I go through that and cross out the things we don't need (for the meals we don't like).  I add other things (for the meals we are replacing) and off I go to the supermarket on Sunday afternoon and do the weekly shop.

I love how easy most of these recipes are.  I am time poor.  I am often tired after working all day, so to then come home and cook dinner can be a bit of a chore in my household and take away is a regular occurrence due to this.  We do still get take away I will be honest.  Well I don't, I will use one of my already prepared meals from the 12wbt menu as my take away, but my family does love Japanese and this is our most regular take away.   But the recipes for 12wbt are SO easy!  Easy and quick to prepare and really delicious.

There was a beef and broccolini stir fry the other night.  I had it as is and my son had it with rice!  We both LOVED it!  Gobbled it down and it is now going to be a regular on our dining plan.  I have loved the lunches too.  I think my favourite has been the Beef, Horseradish and Beetroot sandwich.  I have had this many many times as it is easy for me to make in the morning and take to work with me.  Another favourite is the rice cakes with avocado, turkey and sprouts!  YUM YUM YUM.

For breakfast this morning I had an egg and bacon wrap.  It was an egg, some cooked bacon and sprouts in a mountain bread wrap.  It is SO tasty and I have had it a couple of times now (have swapped another breakfast for this one).

Now I have had some I wasn't a fan of, the Fish Stew was one of them.  I just didn't like the spice flavours,  but from the 12wbt forum comments, I seem to be the only one who didn't like it, LOL  But we all have different tastes, which is why being able to swap for another meal item is great.

Anyone thinking about doing Michelle Bridges 12 week transformation challenge and are worried about the food.  Don't be!  The food is fantastic.  Easy to prepare, easy to cook, great for time poor and the portions sizes are great!  Much larger than I expected.

Inspiration Board

The weekly surprise task this week was to create an inspiration board.

I did my board on Pinterest.  I love Pinterest, yes I do have the addiction.  I find so much inspiration on there.  So many great quotes.

Here is a little look at my board.  You can have a look at the whole board and read all of my little snippets or thoughts I have placed below each picture... http://pinterest.com/abusymother/monnie-s-inspiration-board/